When Desire and Ability Don't Mesh

I've long been someone who preaches "You just have to make the time to write." Along with, "Write every day."

These last couple of weeks, I'm realizing that I have a burning desire to write, and my writing hours aren't meshing with that desire. My ability to produce, has been blindsided by one thing after another.

Sure, I'm still putting in words daily, and I'm still making sure I devote the effort, but I'm getting increasingly frustrated with the number of things that are intent on deterring me.

The latest was my living room.

Today while I'm getting things in order and gearing up for what would be a productive night of writing, with the ability to knock out at least half of my remaining words needed to complete a book, a friend of mine walks into my kitchen and says, "There's a puddle in your living room."

Well, my first instinct was, "Damn dog."

Oh no. It couldn't be that simple. My roof is leaking. Which put my mind on roof repairs for the rest of the day. And that means my weekend is now devoted to repairing the roof. Now, I have a pan keeping water off my hardwood floor and praying for everything to freeze solid. Snow, that I was bemoaning and hoping would go away, I want to stick around. Heck, big fat chunks of ice that take years to thaw out would be awesome right now. Anything to stop the plink plink plink background noise and the reminder that I have a headache to deal with that I can't fix immediately.

All of which is making it terribly difficult to focus on conflict resolution and happily ever afters.

Ugh.

But for those of you who are having similiar experiences with confined muses, take heart. If you can manage to drown out the noise, when you can tap into that muse and escape the reality for a little while, it does make the pounding in your head a little easier to deal with. The hammers might start up again the minute you get away from the computer, but as I've learned in the short tidbits of time I've been able to steal since January started -- for a little while, everything is normal and calm when I can craft words.

If I can just figure out how to, say, keep the kids from drowning the cat when I send one to help the other wash his hands... I might be able to eek out a few more words each day.

Laugh!

Happy writing all.

~Claire
www.claireashgrove.com

Frustrations

Several weeks ago, perhaps longer, I read a post by Dean Wesley Smith about how authors should not be afraid to mention how long it takes them to write a book, and that the perception that writing a book in a short time is a bad thing is hogwash. He went on to say that prolific writers are the writers of the future. At the time I read that, I had really no idea attitudes or perceptions like this existed.

Oh, could I have not begun to realize how quickly my little delusions would shatter.

I am a prolific writer. I write quickly to boot. (It drives my critique partners nuts sometimes -- right gals?) I have been fighting constraints related to this. Been told to slow down. Been advised to steer away from areas I want to pursue. Been told to not admit how quickly I can put a book together start to finish.

All since I started reading Dean's blog -- maybe he jinxed me. Laugh!

So today, after hitting a final plateau in my frustrations, I bit the bullet and reinvented myself incognito so I can pursue some of my other passions. And you know, it felt liberating to take that jump. To embrace this evidently shady side of my nature and celebrate it by promoting it. I'm still Claire, still writing romance, and that won't change. But I also have an alter-ego, and my alter-ego doesn't write romance at all.

Let's change this, authors, if we can. It's really a shame that an author can't be congratulated for multiple accomplishments under the same identity. We've been branded, we've given control over our careers to others. I read an agent who said once, "Revisions should take at least six months to complete." -- Says who? Doesn't that depend on how quickly the author grasps what's being asked of her, how quickly she can apply that, and how much time to spend with her craft she has?

There's something wrong with the belief that quality is only established within certain parameters of time. Quality is only dependant on how seriously the author applies herself to her craft. I can't buy into any other philosophy. I mean, we're talking sheer math to a degree. If one author has 12 hours in a day to write, and another author has 2 hours to write... yeah... those revisions might take six months for the second, but that time is going to be significantly shorter to the first author.

It's like saying the only way to achieve an "A" in school is to study by one method and one method only. And as authors, people who exercise -- really exercise -- the creative part of our brains, telling us there's only one way to write and only one acceptable approach is simply... unacceptable.

So here's to escaping frustrations, and here's to embracing the red-headed stepchild of my personality :)

~Claire

Looking Forward

Well, it's that time of year again, where I start looking at what I did this year, and what I want to accomplish next year. I'm working on a series of posts about goals on my personal blog, The Muse, so I'm going to skip that discussion here. But I thought I'd do a brief recap since part of our Dreamweaver blog is geared to share experiences.

QUERIES/SUBMISSIONS:
Thank every being that is powerful and divine I no longer have to deal with this. My agent (bless her a hundred times over) now holds the bulk of this responsibility. Sure I have to input. Sure I have to provide the content for her to work with. But wowee, this is the best darn part of having an agent for me -- I only have to write these damnable things and open myself to blood-letting rejections for contests or in preparation for a face-to-face pitch.

That said, I'll share a little bit of insight on what was shopped this year.

--My Templar book1 went on submissions, and sold.

--My historical project has met the brick wall of currently not in market demand. Sad, as I am particularly in love with that series, but so be it.

--I submitted a brand-spanking new project to my agent, in a brand-spanking new subgenre that will go out sometime early in 2011.

--I revisited a previously completed paranormal project and it is currently under review.

SALES:
I had two sales this year, the Templar series and A Christmas To Believe In to the Wild Rose Press.

PROMOTIONS:
Where I've shed the nightmare of queries, I've inherited the nightmare of promotions. This year I've blogged my little heart out, tried to network as much as time can allow. I purchased some advertising opportunities (after extensive consulting with fellow authors -- more time), that will happen in 2011. I've made book trailers for three books/projects. (Go check 'em out!)

WORKS COMPLETED:
Hee. This is always my favorite part because what I have done in a particular year is never obvious by an end-of-year recap. Where I only show that I sold two books, I have written six and 3/4 books, plotted in detail double that, revised one, started a side-project, and handled edits on two. Shew!

So what am I looking at in 2011?

Well, of those manuscripts completed, two already sold, another two are contracted, and I already discussed the others. Which leaves me looking at finalizing the Templar series in 2011, starting a new historical project, finishing the side-project, completing another project for TWRP with Dyann, and writing the follow up to the brand-spanking new project. All told, I'm looking to complete seven full length manuscripts in 2011. If the project currently under review gets the go-ahead, that will also mean revisions on the second book already written.

I anticipate a year of heavy editing as well. I'll have edits for Templar1, possibly edits for Templar2. Edits for the TWRP project.

My special project is in a field completely unrelated to romance. That requires some intensive market studying and research there as well. But I hope to break into the market and embed myself professionally there too. If it goes, I'll have to change out one of my planned writing projects to write a sequel.

RELEASES:
I will see the release of Waiting For Yes. That's all I know concretely at this time. Though I anticipate an additional Christmas release, and the release of Templar1.

PROMOTIONS:
The bane of my existence will only intensify. Each book sold will require a trailer -- not necessarily a demand but something I've committed myself to maintaining. Blogging has to keep up, and I must maintain my attempts to network.

I'll also be traveling this year, presenting a workshop at the NOLA STARS conference in March, and hopefully attending two other events that I haven't quite nailed out yet off my list of possibilities.

2011 is promising to be a busy year. While on the surface it may seem impossibly busy, it's really not much more than what 2009 or 2010 has presented. It's just a readjustment of priorities and a matter of trading out some of the things I was doing, for some of the things I must now do.

To accomplish these things I've developed a very tedious schedule and a whole set of individual goal lists.

As I mentioned before though, and will continue to mention on The Muse, being a writer is a job. It isn't just a lark. And while some might believe that getting published is the end of the ladder, an accomplishment that makes life easier... oh heck no. The only time it becomes easy is when a writer attains the status of King, Koontz, Roberts etc. Authors who are household names and folks who don't even read the genre know them. I'm not saying their work is any less difficult than mine, necessarily, but one thing is for certain... they can be counted on to sell just on name alone, and promotions definitly isn't something the author has to invest a lot of time with. Submissions/queries/sales neither. They have their own share of heavy demands. But when one attains that level, the job of being an author falls more in line with the perception of having a 'cush job'. I'm absolutely certain the reality is different.

Starting A New Book

This kinda ties in with what Dyann was saying:

There's a certain energy about a new story, and I think this is probably my favorite part of writing. First, the idea takes hold. Then, the plot unfolds (because I'm a plotter.) Then, about a week later, I get to put words down... and for me, there's no better thrill. All that thinking starts to develop. All that imagry comes to life.

For the first time in my life, I'm doing NaNoWriMo, and I put off starting my Templar book until the 1st of November. Add into the fact that this is one of the stories I've been wanting to write since I developed the concept, and the fact that the outline has been done for months, and there was some serious anticipation building!

Now though, I'm fully immersed in the story, and having the time of my life. About six chapters to the end, I will wish I was already done, and then I'll hit the final climax, and won't be able to write fast enough to keep up with the ideas in my head.

It feels good to be writing after a few forced weeks doing nothing but edits, housekeeping stuff, and critiques.

How about all of you? Do you share that special energy when you get to put those first chapters down? Are you NaNoing this year at all?

PS -- everybody glance sideways. Our brilliant silent member, Kimberly, is kicking some rear on NaNo -- go Kimberly!! (So are Dyann and Cathy, but I wanted to give a special shout out, given she's working extra-special hard to find time.)

The Voices in My Head

"I killed Ash today." I picked up one of my fries and popped it into my mouth. "It made me sad but I had no choice. He had to go."

Dennis just nodded. "That's too bad. I know how much you liked him."

It's not unusual for me to tell my husband about my writing over the evening meal. Tonight it was Mickey D's. The person in the next booth gave me a wide-eyed look before they gathered up the last of their meal and scurried away to dump their trash.What had to be going through their minds as they pulled out of the parking lot?

So, yes, the characters in my books have a tendency to use my head as their personal playground. The craziness hits when I'm so into the story that they become real. They aren't just little cut-outs to move around in my busy brain. They have goals, motivation, and conflict-- just like the rest of us. That's the most important thing to remember when writing--give your characters life. Make them well-rounded, even the villains. They are as important as your hero or heroine. Use a deep point of view whenever possible to get the reader inside the character's head.

I like to think of my books as character driven but with a strong plot line. I chart my characters well before I ever sit down to write the actual story. I make out a list of their history, their likes, dislikes, their goal, motivations, conflicts and even little quirks they may have. This way I know if something doesn't feel right. Is the motivation too weak, are the conflicts enough to carry the story? So do I even care if this character lives or dies? Are the stakes high enough?

The next thing I do is an outline. Yes, I used to be a pantser but my current and former critique partners have shown me the light. I can write much faster if I know where I'm going and what my characters are doing at any given point. I still allow myself wiggle room for creativity. One critique partner keeps a firm rein on her characters at all times. She doesn't allow them out to play. This is the way she works. Everyone is different. Another critique partners has a list of high points and where her characters intersect but she still has a steady hand at the wheel. My outlines tend to be more like a ten to fifteen page synopsis with the character chart attached. This is when I sit down to write the book.

And then it happens.

Regardless of all my fine planning, my characters let me know if I'm trying to make them go in a direction they shouldn't. I can almost see them with their arms crossed over their chests with a belligerent look on their faces. I created them one way and if I try to write them into a situation that doesn't fit, the book comes to a screeching halt. Like people everywhere, they have to be true to themselves.

So, yes, your characters can drive you crazy, you fall in love with them, and when you really love a secondary character--that's the time to kill them off, or save them for another book. Either way, they have to fade into the sunset.

I know every writer approaches their books in different ways, but I don't know of one that hasn't had a character stop them dead in their track at some point. It happens. And when it does, listen to the voices in your head. They are your friends.

Dyann Love Barr

First Book I've Ever Set Aside

Now... I'm not going to names, first and foremost.

But tonight I set aside the first book that I've ever picked up and started to read. The book was published by a house I usually gobble up everything they put out. The author was new to me. (And if you've watched my posts at Cascade -- no it wasn't one of the two books I mentioned there that I was interested in.)

In the first three pages of the story I changed points of view so many times it was frightening. And that just set off the nails on chalkboard feeling for me. So, I literally tossed the book aside. I don't know about the rest of you, but after listening to class after class on craft, I have become more or less a POV purist. I want the change blended smoothly if it isn't at a scene or chapter break, and I want to stay there for at least a page. I don't like author intrusion -- when a character starts describing things they couldn't possibly see/know about themselves -- and I don't like to feel like a ping-pong ball when I'm trying to follow a story.

Ask my poor crit partners... these things drive me nuts.

I even double-checked the publication date on the novel -- 2010. The cover was awesome. The premise really enthused me... but wow... I just can't get past the head hopping and author intrusion and how it cleared an editor's desk. Espeically out of this house where everything is usually something that makes me wish I had written the book.

Anyway, it got me thinking about how I've grown. I remember one early critique partner pointing out my head hopping, and to think that my personal writing avoids even the blended POV shift now is kinda funny.

I've heard pre-published authors talking about "Well so and so does it..." and I hadn't really realized how much of this still happens beyond some of the big, established names. (And to my knowledge this author doesn't qualify as "big" "established"). But now I can see where confusion comes from. I can see how come folks have trouble with "my manuscript was rejected for head hopping" when published authors are doing this.

Have you all noticed this? I say, I have to toss my hat into the "confused" pile now.

Anyway -- Folks, don't succumb to the 'cheat' of head hopping. There's a place and a time to switch POV, and it isn't a bad thing to switch POV. But switching every three to four paragraphs tends to infuriate readers like me.

Revison Horror

I love writing 'The End'. It's a bit sad and I know I'll miss my characters. No, let me rephrase that, I'll miss discovering all the little things about my characters that I didn’t know when I started the journey. Especially their quirks, sense of humor, and the unexpected lines that sometimes pop out of their mouths. It's always a sad goodbye. Think of Joan Wilder in ‘Romancing the Stone’.

That is until I realize I'm headed for, as one of my friends calls it, 'the suck from hell'. Yes, I'm talking about rewrites, revisions, edits, whatever you want to call it. I can hear it pulling in my time and at my brain like a black hole. I put it off as long as possible because I want to remain in love with my characters. They are my children and I hesitate to take them to slaughter.

The amazing thing about rewrites is that I find out how good I am, and how bad. Now my friend Claire Ashgrove will tell you that I spray commas all over the place, much like a boxer's spit when he's hit with a good right hook. My grammar needs a lot of work. I notice some of the stimulus/response is backward. Sheesh! But then, in the midst of all this mess, I find gems that I can’t believe I wrote. They make me laugh, cry, and sigh as the romance goes forward.

So, now I’ve fixed the most egregious mistakes and send the work out to my critique partners. I’m confident they will say it’s great and send it out for submissions. The poor thing comes back bleeding. I look over their comments and decide which areas of the story have to be reworked. Poor baby. This means I have to start from the beginning and reread, fix it, and send it back. More revisions. By now I’m getting a little tired of my characters. I know them backward and forward. Sometimes they even begin to annoy me – like my least favorite aunt with the grating voice. It’s one more time around the revision block.

I send it off and it sells. Yay!! Now the editor takes a whack at it. Three more edits later, I’m ready to kill every one of my beloved characters in the most bizarre and satisfying ways. I’m itching to go on to the next book. The creative fires are burning bright and I’m stuck in revision hell.

There is a happy ending to this horror story. The first time I saw my book cover and it’s love all over again. Yes, found find things I wished I’d changed, things even my critique partners and my editor missed but it’s done. Now all that’s left is wait for the review—but that’s another story.

Dyann Love Barr

Twitchy Fingers

Well, for the first time in probably the last two years, I'm confronted with the reality that... I'm not writing right now. And I have twitchy, itchy fingers.

I finished up my last project, affectionately known as The Monster, a couple weeks ago. Decided then that it was time to catch up on some much-needed house-keeping writing wise. So I caught up on some blogs that I follow, touched base with a few authors I don't talk to nearly enough, and have been doing this and that here and there, for the last ten days or so.

Then, edits landed in my lap, for my last Wild Rose project and a few cleaning up tasks required on a manuscript my agent is working with. And it was time to do some piddling with my 3rd Templar book as well.

So here I am... with the cleaning up tasks left, and 9 contest entries to judge for MARA, and I can't put a single creative word on paper. I'm going crazy!

The plan is that I'm going to get these things finished over the weekend and actually read. Then, come Nov 1, I'm delving into a new project, with my critique partners (I think) and playing NaNoWriMo. But man... that seems so far away...

Wail. What am I going to do?! This idleness is killing me.

Pushing Boundaries

In working with this new project, I've had to change up some of my habits and break some routines so my "boundaries" wouldn't be the same. One of the things that I've altered is, I've started listening to music while I'm writing. Not anything I'm a crazy fan about (like good classical, or sweeping orchestral because that totally distracts me.) Pop music actually. Which is great for a drive, but not normally part of my writing formula.

Anyway, I've discovered something that I probably should have realized a long time ago. There are a few songs that I absolutely cannot stand because they provoke such intense reactions. For instance, Rhianna's Unfaithful. When I first heard this song a year or so ago, it really made me ill. The message conveyed in there just... well, it bothered me.

Now, the song bothers me because it's very... raw. I've gotten over the need to preach "Hey. You can control yourself, lady." Now it just twists my guts because of the deep emotion in the song, even though I don't agree with the "message". Eminem's song, I Love The Way You Lie does the same thing to me. I mean for goodness sakes, lyricwise, the message is pretty disturbing. But combined together with the vocals and how the vocals are sung, it's a very moving song.

All of which, in an odd sense, has made me change a few approaches in my writing. Being able to appreciate the artistic value of songs that I'd previously snorted over, has allowed me to expand my own writing horizons. It's made me realize that it is okay to use a word choice that might not be pleasant for someone. (Always depending on context). It's okay to, where appropriate, have a little shock value.

I haven't been a writer who's afraid to use profanity, or afraid to open the bedroom door, or liberally apply blood. Don't get me wrong. But with this project specifically, it needed to be a little raw. Which I've been able to achieve with moderate ease, after pushing different boundaries.

And the moral of this little rambling? Sometimes it takes literally removing the box, not just stepping outside it, to grow. If, as a writer, there's something you want to accomplish, but perhaps you aren't certain you can, before you decide whether you're really capable or not, change your habits. Explore new territories. In the end, you'll appreciate the fact you have.

And now, back to writing, so I can meet my commitment of having this to Jewelann Monday. EEP!

Stumbling Into the 21st Century

What do critique partners, blogging, and putting on my 'big girl panties' have in common?
I've been dragged, kicking and screaming, into the the 21st century. I'm one of those people who are computer illiterate. No, that's wrong. I know just enough to be dangerous. Until now, I've refused to see my computer as something more than a glorified typewriter.Besides, my husband is the IT officer at his office-- he'd do all that 'stuff' for me. Why should I have to know how to do anything? Who cared?

Let me tell you.

My first book, A Perfect Bride for Christmas, is coming out on November 12th from The Wild Rose Press. I thought, okay, that's done-- on to the next book. Ideas are flowing and I'm ready for my characters to hit the page. Not so fast my friend. Did you know there was a business end to this whole getting published gig? I had a vague idea, some abstract notion that I might have to do 'something'. Marketing hit me in the face like lemon meringue pie.

Website construction is the first. Now that has been a dozy. My critique partner generously offered to help me tidy up my website and make it look presentable to any agents that might take a peek. I actually had to have content. My brain was ready to burst. Then there's the whole bookmark thing which again, my overworked critique partner guided me through the rocky shoals. This went above and beyond.

There's more. One friend strongly suggested I get on Twitter. Another Facebook. Yikes-- then blogging. I began to feel overwhelmed and relied on everyone to do these things for me. At one point, both my critique partner and husband stopped holding my hand or refused to listen to my whines of "But I don't know nothin' about doing a blog, or how to do a book trailer." Their look said, "Frankly, my dear. I don't give a damn." Don't get me wrong, it was more an nudge in the right direction than a complete refusal to help. They gave me some tools and told me to go for it but they wouldn't do whatever I needed. I had to learn to do them for myself.

I'm still shaky on a lot of this stuff. All my critique partners will offer helpful hints if I get to the point of banging my head against my desk but I know I have to man up and do things myself.
Now I'm working on a book trailer, stumbling and falling along the way, but I'm finding myself enjoying the experience.

It's baby steps but that's what it takes.

~Dyann